I eat because I can't stop.

Hi there..
Long time no talk. I hope you're well.

I currently can barely do up my pants, it's uncomfortable to sleep on my side and sometimes when the escalator is broken I take the elevator instead of the stairs.

What has happened to me?

I have gone back to being a food addict and it's embarrassing. I went through a fun period where I thought "fuck your beauty standards, i love me for me" which was super great and everything but then I also said to myself "fuck it, im eating the massive serving of fried noodles, cupcake(s) and latte and nobody can stop me." *unzips pants*

This isn't loving me for me.

Loving yourself means that you don't eat 1200 calories in one sitting. Loving your body and curves means taking a 20 minute walk/jog after or before work instead of watching 8 episodes of breaking bad while downing a bottle of wine.Loving yourself means having enough respect for your body not to eat 4000mg of sodium in one horrible boxed meal.

So where do I stand, what do I do? I keep failing and it's really hard. I haven't been on a scale in over 5 months and I'm too scared right now to invest in one.

I really have no answers and I'm pretty much lost right now. Somethings gotta give...and I'm hoping it's not the buttons on my pants..


xo Breton